Haven’t we all had disagreements with friends, family conflicts, or issues that arise among friends or others from time to time? Most all of us have been a party to these conflicts but it is the handling of the conflict that makes all the difference. As we accept the grace and forgiveness from God, we should also be willing to forgive others. Often times, this is not easy to do but we are commanded to forgive others just as Christ has forgiven us in the Bible. It is our responsibility to pray about the situation and ask God to help us understand and resolve the conflict.
Too often, each person tends to dwell on the issue rather than trying to understand the situation or simply to forgive and forget. Often the conflict is allowed to drive a wedge between the relationships that seems insurmountable with either party willing to take the initiative to resolve the situation. We tend to forget about forgiving as Christ has forgiven us. We fail to focus on the important things in life, being obedient to Christ as well as the relationship with family and friends, but rather allow the feelings of hurt and anger to overtake our lives. Many times there is not a sincere effort to understand or a willingness to seek to settle the conflict. We say we are willing to forgive with our mouth, but the willingness to forgive is not present in our hearts. We do not rely on God to help us and we continue to hold on to the underlying causes that have a hold on us.
The first step in resolving the conflict should be to pray. Let God help you as you seek to understand the situation and develop a willingness to forgive. However, when the anger and hurt is harbored so deep inside and forgiveness is not present in your heart, it is difficult to ask even ask God to intervene. It is like asking God to resolve a situation that you really do not want to resolve. Naturally, in order to totally resolve the conflict, both parties must make an effort. However, even if the other person is not willing to forgive, it is important that you truly forgive the other person so that you can replace the turmoil in your life with an inner peace.
Often times those involved are too prideful to simply say, “I’m sorry,” because they do not feel responsible and they feel that another family member should apologize first. Maybe one of the family members has done something wrong, but haven’t we all done something wrong at one time or another. We want to blame the other person, while finding no fault in our own actions. We must be willing to try to see the other side of the story and understand their reasoning as we seek to forgive. Pray that God will help you to understand and that you will develop willingness in your heart to make amends.
It is best to resolve the situation immediately rather than allowing the wounds to fester out of control. Don’t allow yourself to become too prideful to be able to restore an important relationship. Don’t place other things, such as money or pride, before the relationship. Don’t continually try to place the blame on others, thus not allowing the relationship to mend. Even if it is not family or close friends, we are commanded to forgive and forget. Experience a peace that only Christ can give as you call out to him and seek to be obedient to his command to forgive others as Christ has forgiven you.
Life is simply too short to dwell on such distractions. We are not promised a tomorrow. Forgive now before it is too late.
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Colossians 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
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